Money Matters

Re: Money Matters

Postby embolism99 » July 16th, 2012, 8:51 am

I'm getting frustrated with emails written in broken English, and am still unable to entirely intepret the fee schedule sent by Dr. Patel. Our 2nd installment of $17000 is now done, and we are having twins. She says that will take care of delivery and the account will be settled, but then in another email says that delivery is extra and that incomplete sentence has more stuff in it that is extra.

So what is due upon arrival?
:?
In my understanding the $2000 "Death" benefit is refunded when the surrogate survives delivery. I'm thinking that was included in the $17000.

The $2000 emergency delivery fee is refunded if there is no emergency delivery. I am assuming that means if there is no Caesarean section, but I'm not sure. I know with twins it is likely to have one. I'm also thinking this was included in the $17000.

I'm relatively sure that we pay $2000 extra to surrogate upon arrival....but does this equal the 25% extra in the emails she speaks of?

The $750 twin delivery fee is perhaps what will still be due for delivery, but I"m not sure. That would make sense because the numbers would work out.

She also talks in the email of an antenatal checkup fee, which isn't mentioned anywhere in the fee schedule she sent.

I'm working 60 hour weeks and we are spending everything we have left on this, so I need some clearer numbers to work with to prepare our budget. Can anyone help me?

Thank you in advance,
Emily Grover
Emily Grover
embolism99@yahoo.com
Twins October 2012 on 2nd try (used donor eggs) with Dr. Patel
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Re: Money Matters

Postby spanky » July 16th, 2012, 9:31 am

Emily, I feel your frustration and I was the same way with the money. In the end, I did things the 'Indian way' and negotiated everything with Hitesh in his office to settle our account. It wasn't really a negotiation to be honest, I just told him that I understood I would be charged X and they were asking for Y. He said, OK pay X and everything is fine.

I know that is not exactly what you were asking for, and I really do feel your pain, but my advice is to concentrate on the babies, their health and travel arrangements to and from Anand and just settle the money when the time comes. I really think they are reasonable about money and if you have an email that states a charge and then later emails that add unexpected things just tell them and I think it will work out in your favor.
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Re: Money Matters

Postby windmiam » August 20th, 2012, 6:00 am

Emily -
I am right there with you. My email has seven large dollar amount sections (sections A-G) and then a grand total. But, each of the seven sections has other charges underneath it. I cannot get clarification on exactly what is due, what each section amount covers and what is not covered. It is very frustrating and when you are spending large amounts of cash, you want to know exactly what the money is going for. I feel your pain!! :)
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Re: Money Matters

Postby smitha2015 » August 2nd, 2015, 9:46 pm

Hi Everyone

We are expecting our baby at Dr. Patel's hospital in Sept 2015. I am really not understanding about the money thing, we are paying our charge to Dr. Patel and we always get nice emails from Dr. Patel regarding check up, ultrasounds, updates etc. I talk to my surrogate every week, we are from India staying in US. My surrogate always keep on asking me to pay extra money apart from the surrogate agreement. As I am really happy with the service and everything, I was planning to give her some extra money but not a big amount. Now a days, she keeps on talking that other parties are giving their surrogate extra money amount like INR 1 Lack which is close to USD 1500. I am really pissed off with all these expectation from her as I am already paying a huge amount to Dr. Patel and also sending lots of gifts to her. At the end of the day, our baby is with her, I am not sure how to handle, anybody has this kind of issues?
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Re: Money Matters

Postby spanky » August 4th, 2015, 8:22 am

Congratulation smitha! This is a tough one. Everyone's circumstance and feelings about this are unique (including the surrogates) My initial reaction is that it is just money and comparatively so much more important to the surrogate than to you. So if you can give, then give. In the future you may look back and wish you had given even more (I sometimes do). That said, I have no idea about your financial situation so you really have to balance this the best you can. No one wants to feel taken advantage of in any situation, but trust me, when you look back in a few years it likely will not seem like much compared to the gift you are receiving.

We stayed 4 months in Anand and went through a similar situation although in person with our surrogate asking for a lot. We sometimes felt uncomfortable, but also gave a lot of extra money and gifts. Honestly, it got to a point where I had to ask someone to talk to her and her husband and ask them to leave us alone. I have to give a little context about that though- Our daughter was born very early and spent two months in Dr. Anita's NICU. The surrogate would come to the NICU while we were visiting our daughter, not even sure if she would survive at that time, and asking for things. This was too much for us at the time. Now writing this I feel a little bad at the memory, but at the time we needed some space and time with our baby and felt uncomfortable and pestered by the surrogate and her husband.

From afar and via email I know exactly how you feel though. It is particularly difficult because I guess you are not communicating with your surrogate directly and makes you wonder if Dr. Patel is even giving all the money to her, etc.

What I would do is just say in an email (or phone call) that you will take care of all money things when you are there in person. Then get back to preparations for your trip and return home to your new life :)

Hope that helps some. Best of luck to you.
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Re: Money Matters

Postby Lily2013 » September 1st, 2015, 2:15 pm

Hi Smitha,

First of all Congratulations to you!!!

I too got my baby last year Oct’14 thru Dr Patel’s clinic. She is really a Godsend, truly an Angel for me :)

You have asked about the money thing… it depends upon person to person.

As most of the surrogates come from lower income groups so they always want more from the intended parents. Some surrogates never ask for money but some surrogates are really very greedy and always ask for money and gifts… Even some Nannies are also very greedy and they try to take advantage of your kindness …so beware …

We have given INR 50,000 and some gifts to our surrogate because she was very nice, she never asked us for money and any gifts. But the Nanny we hired was so greedy…even though we paid her double she was not satisfied …Some parties doesn’t pay anything extra to their surrogates and Nannies…at that time I heard one surrogate got just INR 5000 and one nothing at all…

So, It depends upon you only… if you are satisfied with your surrogate then pay some extra otherwise it is not mandatory.

Regards,
Lilly
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